Confidently Embrace Your Masculine Energy and Values

In this article I explain why it’s important to confidently embrace your masculine energy and values to build a strong, attractive, trustable and respectable masculine presence (the way people experience you).

Identifying your values and defining how you want your masculine energy to come across to other people is a very fulfilling journey that results in less stress, less anxiety, feeling more energetic and more confident so you can relax and enjoy life more.

If you want to be more confident, building your self-esteem becomes a daily practice of exploring, defining and aligning with your core values – these values break down into 3 key areas:

Who you are as a man (Your Character)

What you believe in (Your Moral Compass)

What you want to create (Your Purpose & Life Mission)

Put together these 3 areas define Your Masculine Energy.

There is a huge difference between a man who lives in alignment with his unique masculine energy and one who doesn’t.

Living in alignment with your values affects every area of your life, from your personal relationships to your mental health, to your chosen career.

With a clear understanding of your personal values in each area, you’ll be better equipped to become a stronger, more confident and more authentic version of yourself.

Embracing Your Masculine Energy and Core Values

When you fully embrace your masculine energy and core personal values, life starts responding to you differently. You become a source of strength and truth, like a strong, sturdy oak tree which people can rely upon and trust especially when going through life’s difficult moments.

Knowing Yourself Builds Other People’s Trust in You

Do you want to be more respected and trusted by those people who matter most to you? When you are strong and consistent in who you are and what you stand for other people feel more secure and protected in your presence.

In your romantic relationship, your confidence grows, you trust yourself more, you can be more relaxed and assertive and that creates more trust and connection with your partner.

Your clarity in your values will reduce your anxiety and life becomes more fun, more interesting and more fulfilling.

Your Journey to a Thriving Marriage

A client of mine, Robert, was struggling to fully embrace his masculine energy and his marriage was suffering badly because of it.

Robert had a tendency to prioritize his own personal desires over his commitment and responsibility to his wife and family which made his wife feel disconnected from him, she felt low down on his priority list and ultimately she felt unloved by him.

His actions didn’t match his words and the lack of trust that he would follow through on his commitments created a distance between them which became overwhelming for her to bear which led to her requesting a divorce – much to Robert’s surprise.

As I worked with Robert, he started to understand the things he was great at providing to the relationship (such as financial security and house improvement skills) and the areas where he lacked understanding and confidence (such as emotional connection and intimacy).

Robert found the journey of learning who he wants to be as a man incredibly fulfilling. He struggled for a while with some guilt for not knowing all of this before now, but as he started to own his masculine energy more, his relationship responded in wonderful and surprising ways.

Mental Resilience and Happiness

When you live as a values driven man, you start to build a mental resilience to the challenges of life and a greater sense of well-being, happiness and purpose.

Living to your values means you’re in harmony with your true, authentic self, and you start to experience less stress, less anxiety, less worry and less inner turmoil.

Clarity around your values will help you to navigate the challenges life throws your way with more confidence and calmness.

It often surprises my clients just how much this process improves their mental health and overall life satisfaction. They feel more content, more peaceful, they enjoy having more energy, more motivation and a new inspiration for the future they want to create.

Your Journey Towards Self-Discovery

Similar to Robert, you may have experienced periods of feeling lost, lonely and disconnected even if you’re in a relationship and have a network of friends.

One of the major benefits of defining your core values and then living to them is the effect on your mental and physical health. When you feel lonely or anxious, you are lookign for something outside of you to make the insides of you feel better.

Yes there are many external things that can make us feel better but they are almost always temporary (e.g. alchohol, drugs, a one-night hookup, porn, using food to feel better etc) you get an initial release of the unpleasant feeling, but once the activity is over, you’re straight back to the same feelings.

With your core personal values defined and actionable, you strart to find a sense of purpose and meaning that may have previously eluded you for years, many guys report feeling a level of joy, enthisiasm and excitement that they haven’t experienced for years.

They suddenly had direction and conviction where previously lack of motivation and dissapointment was their usual daily experience.

How Values Affect Your Career Growth & Leadership

As a man who embodies his masculine energy and lives with clearly defined values, you can’t help but become a natural leader.

Values that you consistently live to build trust with your colleagues, as well as encouraging colleague / employee engagement, and creating a better overall experience for anyone that you interact with.

Your coworkers and team members will begin to truly repect and trust you as their reliable, focused and supportive leader. They know what they can expect from you and they know what you expect from them.

They also know that they can bring their questions and struggles to you without being judged or thought less of. As you grow through your values, other people are challenged to grow too.

Workplace Challenges Become Opportunities For Your Growth

If you’ve ever faced workplace challenges, embracing your masculine energy and personal values will help you to view the challenges not as obstructions, but as learning opportunities for your evolution to becoming an even better man.

My client David said that his colleagues didn’t trust him, they said he often made promises he couldn’t keep and lacked the assertiveness needed in his role as their manager and leader.

As David became more confident in himself through our work together defining his character, his values and how he wanted to show up as a better man and a leader, his team’s morale and productivity changed.

They stopped experiencing feelings of frustration, doubt, anxiety and stress and started feeling more calm, more relaxed, having fun again, trusting David’s opinion and leadership, overall the whole department became an easy and respectful place that people looked forward to entering.

Want Your Family To Respect & Trust You More?

Within your family structure, when you embrace your masculine energy and personal values, you become a role model and a consistent anchor of support and love for those you care about the most.

As I work with men around defining their character and who they want to evolve into as a leader, lover, partner, father and son in their family, they report that this process helpes them relax and just BE the man they’ve always wanted to be, they enjoy the commitment, responsibility, and protective nature which they tap into and they create a loving and nurturing environment in which their family thrives.

Your leadership is greatly needed by those you care about the most – even if they don’t seem to want it!

When you become a more intentional man, a man with clearly defined principles and values, people feel the difference. Your consistency and clear communication supports your family members and invites them to come to you for other kinds of support too, over time as they learn more and more aboit this new version of you, they relax, respect you and trust you more and you’ll find that they come to you and rely on your counsel and wisdom more and more.

Your Family Legacy of Unity

Another recent client, Michael, was struggling with conflict in his extended family. He felt criticised, disrespected and emasculated and his family felt let down and like they weren’t a real priority for him.

As we defined what was important to him about being a good father, partner and son, he could see the areas where he lacked confidence in himself and gave up his leadership and support role at home.

We set out a new character definition that felt aligned to who he really wanted to be as a man. We identified what that meant for him in terms of practical actions he could take to start feeling more confident and start standing up for what he wanted to happen in the future.

Mike started to feel his masculine energy grow, he started to speak from his core values and principles. He started to make bold statements of intent and this time he followed through and made good on his promises…and his family loved the change in him.

Where previously his emotional detachment and lack of obvious protective instincts during a crisis caused resentment, arguments and a breakdown in communication, now he was aware of how to keep the emotional connection going no matter how stressful the situation he or the family member was facing.

His newfound strength of character and direct communication rather than avoiding conflict, lead to his family members feeling cared for, prioritised and important and in turn they started to appreciate him for everything he does for them.

What Are The Consequences of Not Embracing Your Masculine Energy and Values?

What happens in the life of a man who doesn’t fully embrace his masculine energy or align with his values?

Life without clear values is a continual battle against uncertainty, dealing with stress and anxiety, and never really feeling the calm, confidence of a man who believes in himself, who trusts himself and who respects himself.

Personal Relationships Struggles

In relationships the most important thing for a man to have is a strong sense of his character – who he is at his core as a man.

Without this, your lack of authenticity, confidence and consistency erodes the other person’s trust in you. You end up trying to please people or avoiding them both of which make other people question your reliability and your priorities.

Without values, when someone challenges you, it’s hard not to get triggered and reactive and take their feedback personally.

With values, you know exactly when you need to respond to something and when to let it go, you can stay calm and express what you think and feel without being afraid of the reaction you might get from other peoiple.

It becomes a core part of your self-confidence – every time you express yourself inline with your true character, you feel good and you don’t need someone else to tell you that you’re doing life right anymore.

The Choice to Transform Your Romantic Relationship

Have you ever felt disconnected from your partner in your relationships?

One of my clients, Don, felt tentative and awkward around his wife. What he really wanted was to get back to the way they used to treat each other. He knew there was still a deep love there between them, but they seemed to be stuck in a frustrating pattern of him trying to reconnect with her and things getting better for a few days and then a big blowup argument would happen again and they would slip back into silently hating each other and he despised it!

His wife’s tendency to prioritize her personal needs and desires over her commitment and responsibility to him and the relationship caused him to feel distant from her emotionally.

We worked together on his self-awareness and some aspects of growing into his authentic masculine values and energy and he learnt that even when she didn’t consider his needs and prioritise the relationship, he could stand strong, not take her choices personally, and lead them back into connection, trust and intimacy again.

Mental Health Challenges

When men don’t embrace their natural masculinity it often leads to a variety of mental health challenges.

Ever heard of a friend, acquaintance or celebrity that you admire suffering terribly or even taking their own life after a relationship breakdown? Unfortunately this is now factually one of the most common causes of male suicide.

If you are battling with inner turmoil, panic, anxiety, and a sense of hopelessness after being disconnected from your romantic partner, there is support available to help you not only get through this but use this sucky situation to create the kind of life you would love to live.

I will help you find your inner strength and give you my self-coaching tools so that nothing that happens in the future will bring you down to this level again.

The constant need we have for our partners to love us, trust us, respect us, be attracted to us, need us and always appreciate us ends up pushing her away ntil you learn how to reassure and calm yourself.

Your Journey to Mental Resilience

If you can relate to having experienced periods of feeling lost and disconnected from your confidence as a man, lover, husband, father, colleague, friend or acquaintance, defining your values as a man will be a very important foundation for your future mental health.

When your values are well defined, unexpected drama in your life no longer makes you angry, you start feeling a new sense of purpose and fulfillment that has often eluded my clients for years, they report back feeling relief, joy, and a new sense of power to create the life they have always wanted.

Workplace Struggles

At work, fully embracing who you are as a man dramatically improves your overall level of calmness as well as the way you communicate, how you respond to unforeseen challenges, how you resolve conflict and build better relationships with your colleagues whether they are working for you, with you or you are working for them.

Knowing yourself better helps you be more assertive because you have more self-confidence, anxiety and worry about “worst case scenarios” becomes a thing of the past because you trust yourself to learn and grow in whatever way you need to to deal with the unpredictability of life.

Overcoming Workplace Challenges with Confidence

My client Anton was a classic people pleaser, always trying to take care of everyone else but often anxious and worried that people didn’t respect him or like him.

His colleagues didn’t trust him because he often said yes to taking on tasks even when he didn’t have the time to get them done, he made promises he couldn’t keep and lacked the assertiveness needed to stand up for what he needed to do his role successfully.

Eventually this lack of trust started affecting his team’s morale and productivity, leading to feelings of frustration, doubt, and stress both for them and for Anton.

So we worked on Anton’s self belief identifying the values that he believes in and building his connection to his own sense of worthiness and value as a man and as a key leader within his business.

Soon he was more assertive, honest and direct when asked to take on new projects and as a result his colleagues began to trust him and rely on his judgement more, they even started to come to him for advice about how to improve their confidence and self belief too.

Dealing With Family Disagreements

Strained relationships are something everyone has to deal with and none more so than when family relations are under pressure.

Without a strong sense of your values and your character as a man, it’s very easy to allow the old patterns of your family hierarchy and “assumed respect” to rule how you show up with your loved ones.

When you don’t trust yourself fully, you may find yourself keeping a certain level of emotional distance from your family members. Often you may think that this is a good form of self-protection, especially with people who may have caused you to feel judged or criticised in the past, but what is really needed here is calm, assertive, confident communication of your standards and values – what you will and won’t tolerate, what you want and what you don’t want.

When most people are given clear structure to respond to they really appreciate it – it helps them know what is expected of them and makes life simpler and less unpredictable. When you’re living inline with your values, it’s easy to see who has the same values as you, so you can easily determine who is a good fit to keep around for your future life and relationships.

Rebuilding Family Unity with Authenticity

With clarity around your character and what’s most important to you, you can start to stand your ground with family members while remaining calm and considerate at the same time.

As you own your part of any disagreements and challenge others to own theirs too, you can rebuild the broken trust and lead everyone back into connection again.

This is a very masculine energy that you may have experienced from other initiated men in your life. Just being around them makes you feel calm and trust that everything is under control.

What to Take Away From This

When you consciously choose to embrace your masculine energy and deliberately live in alignment with your core personal values, you become an inspiring man, a beacon of strength, authenticity, and trust.

Without non-negotiable values, you may find that you try to please others too much and end up losing their trust leading to arguments, loss of intimacy, stress and anxiety, disruption at work and with your family, and all while dealing with a range of volatile emotions from you and those closest to you.

Values really are that impactful in your life.

This journey of self-discovery and growth as a man and leader of your life is incredibly rewarding. Life still throws its challenges and unexpected events still happen, but your ability and confidence in dealing with those events is something you learn to trust and as a result your self-respect and self-worth will reach heights you never thought were possible.

So if you want to become a stronger, more authentic version of you, radiating trust, resilience, and positive change in the world, get in touch for a free 60 minute personal coaching session.

About the author

Hi, I'm Dan. I've been a men’s coach for over 10 years with Goodguys2Greatmen, mentoring and coaching men to get clear on what they want and creating practical and actionable plans to make it happen. I’ve experienced many of the same challenges you're going through right now. I’m here to challenge you and help you understand what's holding you back so that you can step into the confident, successful man you were meant to be.