Hiring a men’s coach will help you get to know and understand yourself, build confidence, renew your self belief and start creating a better career, healthy marriage, healthy relationships with friends and family and an inspiring, fulfilling future.
In the past, coaching was actually referred to as “leadership”.
Most of the men I coach are already very successful leaders in their careers and with their kids but are struggling to have that same level of calm, clear confidence in themselves when it comes to their personal lives and intimate relationships.
We go through a structured process together to identify and expand your understanding of what she needs from you to feel loved and appreciated and become more attracted to you again.
In turn, what you can expect from her is more trust, more respect, and yes, more affection, fun, and intimacy.
People often think that the fun, relaxed, passionate, and sexual part of a relationship, we call the “honeymoon phase,” is only temporary. I know that’s BS. I help men take their marriage to a deeper level of connection, trust, and passion than they’ve ever had before, even in the “honeymoon phase.”
Even marriages that have been going for 25–30 years or more have been rekindled and reached new levels of sexual honesty, openness, and exploration.
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There are so many types of coaches, each specialising in a different aspect of life, from general life coaches to executive life coaches, business coaches, career coaches, relationship coaches, divorce coaches, etc., the list goes on.
So What Can A Men’s Coach Help You With?
- A men’s coach focuses on giving you the tools to reach your full potential as a man.
- A men’s coach will teach you to become a trusted leader, a passionate lover, a reliable husband, a great father, and a valued friend.
- A men’s coach will help you transform your lack of confidence for good.
- A men’s coach will help you deal with common relationship problems and create more physical intimacy and a healthy sex life in your marriage or long-term relationship.
- A men’s coach will help you define a life path that gives you more fulfilment, more excitement, more energy, more enthusiasm, more love, more meaningful relationships, more money, and the freedom and flexibility to live your life with a strong sense of self-confidence and a kind, considerate, yet focused masculine energy.
What’s the difference between a men’s coach and a therapist?
Therapy
- Therapy focuses mainly on the past and the events that caused you to be in the life situation you find yourself in now.
- It’s a safe place for you to talk about your feelings and release pent-up emotions and fears.
Coaching
- A men’s coach works ONLY with men.
- A men’s coach is future-focused. We go through a little reflection on the past to understand how you got here, but then our focus is firmly on creating a new version of you and a new vision with an action plan for you to follow to create the future you really want.
- Men’s coaches have a unique understanding of what it’s like to live and succeed in today’s world with its popularised negative view of men, manhood, “toxic masculinity”, and “the patriarchy”.
Reasons to Hire a Men’s Coach
It can be intimidating to hire a men’s coach. You may think that reaching out for help is a sign of weakness or that there’s something wrong or broken with you.
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Most men are happy to hire coaches to improve their golf swing or get a better return on their financial investment, but the topic of learning “how to be a better man” can trigger feelings of failure because in the past we’ve been shamed for expressing our feelings, such as being told to “man up” or “just be a man.”
Yet working with a men’s coach will help you avoid future failures. It’s also a very understanding, caring, inspiring, and supportive process.
Being able to talk about ANYTHING with someone who really understands what it’s like to be a man struggling with life’s challenges – especially around intimate, romantic relationships – is an incredibly freeing and empowering process.
You will learn how to create a meaningful vision for your future. You will learn how to become a well-rounded, confident, decisive, respected, and resilient man in all parts of your life.
I want you to reach your full potential as a man, who understands what strong masculine leadership looks, sounds, and feels like inside and out.
Here are five signs you might recognise in your relationship which I can help you understand and then learn how to create the passion and closeness you really want.
You’re Doing Your Best In Your Marriage, But It Doesn’t Seem To Be Enough
You’re a long way from that constant happy, falling-in-love feeling you first had together, and you want it back.
You feel weak, unsure and anxious around her.
You try to find the “right things” to say and do, but you’re constantly second-guessing yourself.
You put yourself down and hope she’ll pull you back up with a compliment.
You don’t think highly of yourself, and this has a detrimental effect on your confidence, especially with her.
Either you feel as if you’re not good enough for her, or you may feel like she’s not good enough for you – either way, the connection and intimacy in your marriage is suffering.
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You sense that she’d rather be spending time with other people than you.
You have worked hard to make your wife happy, but over time, you’ve found yourself in a relationship where you feel like you’re compromising yourself too much. It seems like she gets what she needs, but you don’t get what you want.
You may be aware that a lot of the problems you’re experiencing are in your head, but you still struggle to soothe your uneasy feelings.
You know you need some strategies to help you overcome these feelings and activate your confidence and self-worth.
You want to learn how to like and appreciate yourself more.
You want to stop thinking and talking negatively about yourself.
You know that the words you use have a big impact on how confident you feel about yourself, but you can’t seem to find the right path forward.
Relationship issues are both the hardest and most challenging problems we ever have to solve, but they’re also moments to learn resourcefulness and self-worth, teaching you how to learn, evolve, and grow into the man you want to be.
If you don’t love and respect yourself, other people, including your wife, will naturally struggle to love and respect you too.
You Keep Making The Same Mistakes
You can’t seem to get over feeling bad about yourself. You keep making decisions that ultimately hurt your relationship and make you feel hopeless.
To identify and break these destructive habits, first, you have to understand where they come from.
Maybe you use alcohol or pot to help you feel less anxious, or you regularly use porn to soothe your unmet sexual needs.
You know that your sexual life and intimacy with your wife is getting worse, but when you try to talk to her about it, you end up in fights that make things even more distant, colder and less connected.
You’re confused and frustrated about how to move things forward from here, and everything you’ve been trying just seems to make things worse.
Hiring a men’s coach who specialises in working with men in long-term relationships can help you figure out what you’re doing wrong and how to turn things around quickly.
Acquiring these new beliefs, skills, and habits requires accountability and practice.
You will need to be patient and consistent in facing difficult thoughts and emotions head-on, learning how to lead the relationship while still allowing her the time to get to know and trust this new version of you.
Everyone makes mistakes, but you can learn to use those mistakes as fuel for your own growth and as connection points that you can laugh about together.
You Aren’t Confident Leading The Sexual Part Of Your Marriage
You know you have sexual wants, needs, fantasies, and desires, but you’re unsure how to express them. Or perhaps you have some fear and shame for even thinking about them, and you certainly can’t tell your wife.
Maybe you don’t have much sexual desire or sexual chemistry between you currently, and although you want to have a better sexual relationship, you’re not confident in your ability to create more sexual attraction, fun, flirtation, connection, passion, and excitement with her.
Being stuck in an emotionally or sexually unhealthy relationship with no idea how to change it or leave is like torture for many men. You may have many reasons to stay in the relationship like kids, and finances, pets and yes, you do still really love this woman, but…
You may feel like you can’t get her to respond sexually anymore, that you’re just friends, co-parents, or roommates, and that you don’t know how to bring back the excitement and attraction you both used to feel around each other.
I can help you with all aspects of sexual confidence, self-belief, and physical attraction.
It’s also incredibly normal and common for men to suffer from performance anxiety around sex. Whether it’s premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, or just over-analyzing and being too “in your head” while trying to connect with her body.
I can help guide you through these issues and out the other side to an honest, fulfilling, and passionate sex life again.
You Find Understanding Your Emotions And Having Emotional Conversations Difficult
You know that feeling…when you’re in a conversation and it feels like she’s running rings around you. She asks you a question, and before you’ve had a chance to work out how you want to respond, she’s moved on to the next question or is frustrated by how long it takes you to answer.
You may think that you have to get your responses “right” or in some way “make her happy” with your answers.
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What she’s really looking for is your authentic thoughts and feelings on the topic being discussed, and – this is essential – for you to be able to understand how she’s feeling right now.
But many of us men have been trained not to trust our emotions, and so we only respond logically.
“Well that makes no sense…”
“Well you shouldn’t think / feel that way…”
But when she’s feeling her emotions and we respond with logic, she feels completely misunderstood, and uncared for. If I could pinpoint one major cause of relationship breakdowns, it’s that one or both of the partners feel misunderstood and uncared for.
When she says she wants more time with you, to be listened to, to be prioritised, more connection time, or to feel more desired, what she’s really asking for is your leadership.
She wants you to step up and into your strong masculine energy.
Again, we have no problem doing this at work when challenges arise.
So how can you step into this leading role and create more opportunities for connection to happen?
Will you prioritise her and the relationship over the more menial tasks and work tasks that have to be done?
It seems inconsequential, but these little things show her that you care and that she’s a priority for you.
When you don’t understand what she’s really asking for, you may see her become frustrated and angry towards you, but it’s really just her showing that she cares, saying “ouch, I want to feel loved by you and currently I’m not feeling that”.
The problem isn’t that you’re not a good fit or that you have a bad relationship. Instead, because you don’t understand what she means, you misinterpret her needs.
If you can’t connect with each other on an emotional and intellectual level, your attraction and love for each other will naturally fade.
A men’s coach can act as a “translator,” explaining to you what your wife really wants and needs from you and assisting you in determining how to provide that to her in a way that also empowers you and builds your self-confidence.
Final Thoughts
If you want to improve your life and your marriage but don’t know how to, then working with a men’s coach will make a huge difference.
You’ll find out about who you are as a man, husband, lover, father and friend.
You’ll get clear on what’s important to you and start to build a future filled with meaning and purpose.
You’ll spend time and energy on things that excite and motivate you to grow and evolve to your full potential as a man.
With the right support, it’s amazing how quickly things can turn around in your life.
Few of us had a good, consistent, trustable male role model to show us these things as children; most of us have to figure them out for ourselves from experience or mistakes.
I want to give you a shortcut to finding your own version of strong masculine leadership in all areas of your life.
Are you ready to invest in yourself? Get in touch with me today for a free 60-minute coaching call. You have nothing to lose, and a completely different future to gain.